Feeling Myself

I’m going through changes and loving it, mostly because I’ve decided to listen to my needs and wants without letting other people’s opinions affect me. In my thirties I’ve never felt more sure of myself than I am now. I know exactly what I want, what I won’t take, and what I deserve. My motto these days is: ‘be good to yourself’. Going through a breakup isn’t easy. You think about what you could have done better, or if you wasted your time. Neither is true. This is the first time in a breakup where I’ve felt a balance. I’ve learned so much. It is so strange, I feel like I’m dealing more with people’s reactions of my breakup than getting over it.

The truth is that there is no ‘right way’ to feel when you break up with someone. It’s okay to feel sad AND it’s okay to feel happy. I think I grieved towards the end of my relationship and so now that its over there is no need to grieve. Let us live in our sadness if we are sad, let us love deeply if we are in love, and let us live in content if that be so… It doesn’t matter how it ended or what went wrong because its none of anyone’s business. That’s just between me and him. I will say that it was never my intention to bring my boyfriend into social media. It was more of what he wanted. This was the first time that I let everyone in on my dating life, and it will be the last. I don’t think I will share anything about my love life online again until I’m married. Even then, it will probably me minimal. And if I never get married, I’m okay with that too! (OMG did I really type that? Yes I did.) I’ve learned that I would rather have my peace than ANYTHING ELSE. Peace is the greatest treasure, better than love, sex, food, and money.

What I like about being alone: I get to date myself. Honestly, how would you treat YOU if you had to impress YOU? Have you ever thought about that? I’m totally loving it. I take myself to the spa, and love on my body with exercise. I eat what makes me feel good, physically and MENTALLY. I’m painting again… something I hadn’t done since I was single. I take myself on trips. I just love brands like Up In The Air Life and The Ladies Abroad that allow you to travel alone but not really alone. I LISTEN to myself. All the while, I know that this is life and I want to live in it – live in my truth.